Today is one of those days where it seems that anything that could go wrong has gone wrong. Pass me a cup of coffee and some Xanax. Oh wait, I don’t have either. Sorry… I am in full sarcasm, no bullshit mode at the moment. One of my New Year’s resolutions was to complain less, but I’m going to complain.
The day did not start out great. I remember being awake at 4:30 a.m. with Abby but do not remember my alarm going off at 5:00 a.m. I was jolted awake by my husband’s alarm clock at 6:10 a.m. and then sprang out of bed thinking, Shit, I’m late! I woke up with a stomachache and a headache.Abby was still asleep so I was able to get the coffee started and breakfast in bowls before she was calling for me to take her out of bed. It always seems that she is able to sense whenever we are running late because she started doing everything as slow as the sloth at the DMV in Zootopia. She also seems to conveniently develop selective hearing and decided to not listen to anything I was asking her to do this morning. Abby asked to nurse and I let her, even though we were already running late. Evidently she didn’t really want to nurse, as she decided it was funny to stick her feet in my face and kept laughing, which makes it impossible to drink milk at the same time. As I was undressing to get into the shower I smelled poop coming from her direction. I pulled her out of the Pack and Play and attempted to change her diaper… and I do mean attempted. It was like wresting a greased pig. She wanted nothing to do with a diaper change, so what should have taken just a minute or so took more than five minutes.
When I finally was able to shower I noticed that my right breast felt engorged, which was weird because that was the side that Abby was kind of nursing from and it hadn’t felt that way before my shower. I knew I would not get a chance to pump at work until after lunch so I had to breastfeed Abby after I got out of the shower.
Yesterday my husband took Abby shopping and she had soaked through her diaper and I had to remove the car seat cover to wash it. The tag said “Drip dry only” so luckily it was dry this morning, but of course I struggled with getting it put back on the car seat. As I was trying to put it back on I looked at the clock and realized that we should have left the house ten minutes earlier, at minimum, but now we were definitely late. I told my phone to text the babysitter and my coworkers that we were running late and, of course, Google could find every Stephanie I have ever called in my life, but could not find Stefani so route my text message to. I told Google some choice words and then had to immediately tell a wide-eyed Abby to never ever repeat them.
By this time my anxiety was really flaring up. Since we left the house after 8:00 I figured getting to the babysitter’s house would be a piece of cake with no early morning school traffic. That being said, I think I hit every red light between my house and hers. When I put the car in park Abby immediately burst into tears and was inconsolable. She was screaming and waving her arms and kicking her feet at me as I closed the front door and I felt so bad the whole way to work. She made me want to cry.
The parking lot was full when I rolled into work a full half an hour late. I was getting out of the car when I accidentally hit the panic button on my key fob. I sat in my car dumbfounded for a moment, trying to figure out what was going on. I have only had the key fob for a week so the fact that I had hit the panic button wasn’t registering; I’ve never had that happen before. Not only was I half an hour late to work, I announced it to the whole hospital with my car’s horn. Yay. I jogged to the entrance and up four flights of stairs only to walk into my office panting and have my coworker hand me the phone while saying, “Hold on, she’s right here,” and it was my boss on the line.
Please, please let the day get better!